Foolish People's League

GBS: Hello! I am George Bernard Shaw. Cricket lovers know me as the &*@ ^#%$ who said "Cricket is a game played by 22 fools and watched by 22,000 fools". And these days, I hear the number is doubled!

Enter LM

LM: You have lived a cynic and have died one and continue to be so in 'spirit'.
GBS: Who are you?
LM: I am the father of IPL.


GBS: Oh, now I see where it gets its foolish streak from (chuckles)
LM: What is that? Elizabethan humour? Oh please, spare me of it. And look what I made cricket into!
GBS: Even more foolish?
LM: You are just being mean, Mr. Shaw... But remember, it was you who said and I quote "Baseball has the great advantage over cricket of being sooner ended."
GBS: That was my best quote! I thought it out for a week!
LM: And look what it is now! Obsolete, outdated, redundant... just like your humour.

Enter a cricketer

Cr: I heard an auction is going on here...
GBS: Yes, of men in the hands of commercialism
Cr: Oh great! Which one of you is Mr. Commercialism?
LM: (to the cricketer) Don't listen to him. Why don't you be seated? We are expecting the bidders soon.

Cricketer sits.

LM: (to GBS) Do not mess with cricketing talent.
GBS: Ah! Cricketing talent is such an oxymoron.

Enters a Star bidder

LM: Welcome! You are just in time.
Star: Who is he? Another bidder?
GBS: Oh trust me, madame... I will kill myself before taking part in this insane business.
Star: Hey, I know you! You are Bernard Shaw...
GBS: Thank you madame... I am flattered. Its an honour to be known by my hatred for cricket...
Star: Well I sort of know you as the fool who didn't care to show up at Academy Award ceremony and had no respect for your Best Screenplay Oscar
LM: (laughs)what goes around comes around Mr. Shaw... look who the fool is now?
GBS: I am but the humblest of us... but look at madame. She is investing her lifetime's earnings into a game which is considered a threat to her own fraternity.
Star: That is so not true! India loves cricket as well as films...
GBS: And then why, pray, was the release of your motion picture postponed?
LM: Oh, you are just jealous that writers can never be as famous as cricketers
GBS: Oh trust me, I'd rather be an obscure, unpublished writer than play this embarrassing game in the public.
LM: What you call embarrassing is actually entertaining. We have cheer leaders...
GBS: ... who were almost banned by the conservatives and were only allowed after increasing their clothing by 40 - 50 % and who have to be ready for that unpredictable fluke sixes or fours to do their dance that is as untechnical as your game.
LM: We made the game a lot informal...
GBS: Oh yes... now the fielder who is supposed to take a catch can't do his job well, because he is 'live' with the commentators! What a shame!
LM: We have brought the game closer to its fans...
GBS: ... yes, by running wild contests and awarding the winner with 'twelfth man' status for a match... what next? "Drink this cola and captain your favourite team?"
LM: Actually, that's a brilliant idea.
GBS: Forget I even mentioned it...
LM: Too late. I am going to pitch this idea along with my other brilliant plan. We can have 10 balls in an over and if the runs per ball correspond to any mobile number... the winner gets it all!
GBS: Why don't you run a contest of who's the most foolish of us... Is it me trying fight for a game I don't even love... or madame for funding a rival means of entertainment or you who have started it all...
LM: That's another brilliant idea! This way, we can pull in even the cricket-hating demographic into IPL... (turning to GBS) Mr. Shaw, how would you like to endorse cricket-cynicism... you know, a little conflict in the story... people would love it! Mr. Shaw.... Mr. Shaw... where has he disappeared?